Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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