but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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