wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
