highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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