: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
