At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize