Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
