your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Randomize
