Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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