dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
