is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize