if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
