3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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