that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize