just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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