No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
