I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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