one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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