i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
