Whod you bang
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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