I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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