FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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