I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
