why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
handjob tips. give me some.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
