Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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