Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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