His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
