Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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