can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize