was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
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