i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
