This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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