I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
