I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Couch. On fire.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize