my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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