More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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