Soap is not a condiment
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
