She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
And then my night got REAL pukey
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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