She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Sponge bath it is.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
