WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
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