Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
