***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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