butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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