We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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