is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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