he puts the penis in happiness.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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