sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I cut my penus on the lid.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
