butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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