i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
