I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
