Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
