It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
we're so committed to being not committed
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
