What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i wish my penis had a tongue
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
